SCP-084 - Static Tower
One subject from ██████████ █████, found on the grass plane, reported he had been traveling for six years. He was found approximately four hundred meters from ██████████ █████ city limits.
![SCP-6327-J - [redacted for brevity]](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5ec85e2d4c483c5e7cb97193/1677121541297-LFWH50V3ICXE2H2BQYCO/Joke+Series+%28website%29+%282023+update%29.png)
SCP-6327-J - [redacted for brevity]
“There is a current and present emergency, and I am about to describe it. Please listen carefully, as this will contain important information.”
SCP-4966 - Tubbioca: Devourer of Souls, Consumer of Secrets, Lord of Munchies
“The pat people who visit me. They tell the red people stuff through the head parts.”
SCP-083 - An Abandoned Row Home
Both groups [of personnel] inside the property not only described very different living conditions, but their descriptions didn't even correspond to the same floor plan.
Quaran-tainment, Episode 5 - "Society for Cryptids in the Earthly Plane”
“I think you may have got the wrong person,” I said. “I’m Angela Harris, and I’ve been a human my whole life.”
SCP-082 - “Fernand” the Cannibal
When it speaks, it does so through enormous, clenched teeth. SCP-082 only parts teeth to eat food and to sing.
SCP-1162-J - “Double Down Sandwich”
In the case of containment compromise, full nuclear sterilization is considered automatically authorized.
SCP-081 - Spontaneous Combustion Virus
“Due to the United States’ current obesity epidemic, it is crucial that wild SCP-081 be eradicated.”
PILOT EPISODE: “SCP-080 - Dark Form”
Recorded March 2019 as a proof of concept for a potential series of other readings from the SCP Foundation. This podcast is the result.
Quaran-tainment, Episode 4 - "Doors”
She started down the hallway to our room. As I followed I couldn’t shake the feeling that something wasn’t right.
SCP-080 - Dark Form
“Did you just let something in here? It feels like something’s watching me.”
Quaran-tainment, Episode 3 - “A Vulcan Adopts a Cat”
“Thank you for your inquiry. His name is Marmalade.”
Quaran-tainment, Episode 2 - "The Thing Under the Fridge”
“I know that we’re probably the only apartment in the building that doesn’t have a bug problem. That’s, well, that’s you, right?”
SCP-1313 - Solve for Bear
Research into the possible military applications of irrational, exponential, and imaginary grizzly bears is currently being undertaken…
Quaran-tainment, Episode 1 - "A Guide to Working the Night Shift"
When [the lights] come back on, your co-workers will be gone… There will be 3 customers left. 2 are spirits, one is real.
SCP-078 - Guilt
…Any task the subject performs more trivial than the basics of survival will induce a bout of neurosis as the subject attempts to rationalize why they did not instead take some other action.
SCP-\̅\̅\̅\̅-J - The Subject is Aware
This entry was generated by loading 3000+ SCPs into the Botnik predictive keyboard app.
SCP-1417-J - Passive-Aggressive Meteorite
Dr. James Anderson… six-time star of the annual Site-19 Christmas Pageant, entered the containment chamber to assist in conducting Emergency Procedure 1634-Broadway.